Facing A Father

“For how shall I go up to my father, and the lad be not with me? lest peradventure I see the evil that shall come on my father.” (Ge 44:34 AV)

 

Judah’s transparent and passionate honesty here is something from which we can learn a great lesson.  The words above are Judah’s words.  This fourth eldest son of Jacob promised his father his life for the life of Benjamin.  Joseph, still unknown to his brothers, demanded Benjamin return with them while Simeon served his sentence.  Joseph and Benjamin being of the same mother, and Joseph assumed dead by his father, was adamant in allowing Benjamin to go to Egypt with the rest of his sons.  When the silver cup of divination was found in Benjamin’s sack, Joseph, as ruler of Egypt passed sentence that Benjamin would serve as his servant.  Then we read of Judah’s words here.  Judah tells his obscured brother that he cannot face his father without Benjamin at his side and offers to serve Benjamin’s sentence.  The words above are words every saint could take to heart.

Expectations are uncomfortable but necessary.  I was raised the old fashioned way.  I had parents that made me accountable for my actions and efforts.  When it came to school, my father had a standard we required from all his children.  Report card time was not the easiest time of our childhood.  As we individually stood before our father, he would review the report card and critique the grades we earned and the comments from our teachers.  I remember this day well.  It was usually a Saturday and he waited until all the reports were in.  Then, one by one, usually by age, he called us to his study.  If there was an unsatisfactory grade or comment, we would have to explain it.  Usually, punishment would follow if we failed to meet his expectations.  Running from it only made it worse.  Since we knew our time was according to age, as we got nearer to our beckoning and reckoning, we might make ourselves scares so our older sibling couldn’t tell us it was our turn.  That only made it worse.  The longer it took for us to appear, the harder it was to face my father.  If we didn’t strive as hard as we could to get the best grade we could muster, then there were consequences.  Shame was one of them.  Especially if our father could point to specific failures that led to our low grade.  Too much time with our friends.  Not enough evening study time.  Too lazy to do the work the right way.  Etc.  He was right and we were wrong.  How could we face our father if we failed to live up to his expectations?

One day, we will have to stand before the LORD and give account for that which He had made us responsible.  We cannot lose our salvation.  For that, we praise the LORD.  However, we will have to give account for what we have done or failed to do in the discharge of our duties.  Paul said, “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad.” (2Co 5:10 AV)  But I think it is more than that.  When Judah spoke those words above, I don’t think he was thinking of any repercussions he might face for failing his father.  I think what really bothered him was two-fold.  He knew that if he appeared before Jacob without Benjamin, then Jacob would die in sorrow.  He would have caused great pain to his father.  Second, I think Judah, deep down inside, knew he disappointed his father in the affair of Joseph and didn’t want to do that again.  I think Judah loved his father and didn’t want to appear before him as a failure to his father’s heart.  It is this we must consider.  Again, one day we will appear before Christ and will have to look at Him with those nail-pierced hands and feet and have to explain why we failed to do all we could for His glory.  That is a disturbing thought.  One that should motivate us to a deep commitment to Him.