Strength To Impact

“Now also when I am old and grayheaded, O God, forsake me not; until I have shewed thy strength unto this generation, and thy power to every one that is to come.” (Ps 71:18 AV)

 I know I have written of this before.  At least the first part of our verse.  As one gets older, there are new anxieties that flood the mind and heart.  They concern health, relationships, and provision.  When we were younger, we depended upon the LORD and ourselves.  As we age, we are no longer able to care for ourselves as we once did.  Our fears of abandonment are real.  Who will care enough to drop by?  Who will make sure the right decisions are made on our behalf?  How will I be able to pay my bills?  These, and many others, course through the mind.  We pray for the LORD’s faithfulness through all of this.  We desire Him to comfort our hearts that we might have the faith necessary to make it through our twilight years.  This was not David’s concern.  At least as stated above.  He was far more concerned that he leave wisdom to an up-and-coming generation before he passes and can no longer share what he knows.  We want the power of life (health) that he might be able to show the next generation the things of the LORD.  David was a shepherd until the end.  Always worried about the sheep more than himself.

My mom was like this.  My mother passed away from complications of non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma.  She was also a type two diabetic.  When she was going through her second to last round of treatments, we had a phone conversation.  She didn’t know what to do about the present round of treatments or if there were more to follow.  She was tired.  She was wore out.  Raising eleven kids and tending to the needs of a husband who was a bit particular would have weakened the strongest of us.  We had a conversation regarding end of life decisions.  She commented there were too many people who were depending on her for her to give up.  That is admirable.  That is the spirit which we should all have.  That is the attitude that David showed right up until the day he passed.  David had to solve the issue of Adonijah and Solomon only days before his home-going.  He was not concerned with his failing health.  He was not concerned with who would take care of him.  He was concerned with the kingdom and whether they would continue in the word of God.

Life will always have its problems, trials, and needs.  No matter the age, there will always be obstacles to overcome.  There is no such thing as a perfect life.  There will always be things that cause anxiety.  There will always be fears.  There will always be those sleepless nights.  There will always be those changes in life that knock us for a loop.  Right now, as I am leaving middle age and making my way to my older years, there are changes in life that come with it.  Changes I should have anticipated.  Changes for which I should have prepared myself.  Changes that are natural, but still a bit unnerving.  Purposes change.  Abilities diminish.  Resources are depleted at a faster rate.  All these things weigh on the mind.  They have since Adam and Eve aged.  There is nothing new here.  I am going through it, and so too will most other men.  It is a pattern of life.  The question becomes, what are my priorities?  Why is it that I want the LORD to be nearer than He ever has been before?  Is it because of all of these changes in life cause anxiety?  Or, like David, should I want the strength of the LORD because, like my Mother, I have people who depend on me and to whom I can impact?  That is the question for the rest of my life.