“Open rebuke [is] better than secret love.” (Pr 27:5 AV)
Although not pleasant, correction is far better than flattery. No one likes to be rebuked. I cannot think of a single soul who hopes his day is filled with the critical remarks of others. Most would rather have the opposite. In our proverb, the king is making a comparison. The one who could rebuke or possesses secret love is one and the same. The secret that he keeps is the issue of rebuke. The love is not secret because the receiver is unaware of that love. Rather, it is secret because he is unaware of the rebuke he needs. The second party has a choice. Either correct an errant brother for his own good and those show open love for him. Or bury the transgression and love him anyway while the transgression continues.
We often allow behavior to continue because “that’s just his nature and everyone knows it”, or “that poor soul has had a rough time of it and we pity him”, or “we don’t want to lose him so we all put up with what he is and love him, anyway”. Now, the Bible does give counsel to pass over transgressions and not make issue of them. Sometimes forgiving and forgetting is the best thing to do. We are not talking about a one-time minor issue. Rather, I think Solomon is speaking of habitual behavior that is unacceptable, would be an embarrassment to the offender, or cause immediate and irreversible harm to others. Letting something go may not be prudent. But that doesn’t mean we need to point out everything, either. The point is simple. If the honorable saint observes poor behavior that is destructive to the errant one, ignoring it is not love. I agree with Paul that any correction should be offered in the spirit of meekness with great wisdom. Being blunt is a last resort.
Being on the receiving end of thoughtful correction is not comfortable. It is not easy taking advice from others. It is difficult to hear where we might be failing. However, if we are honest, we would rather have someone intervene and perhaps deal with short-term ill will than to go on in our error and cause great harm later on. This is the point Solomon is making. If we truly say that we love others, it is better that we say something with a heart of charity and meekness than to ignore it, thinking that loving on them is the better choice. That is not love. That is self-love. We don’t like confrontation. We don’t like to be the bad guy. We want to be the one everyone likes. In the interim, we are allowing great harm to be the result of our silence. It is time to do ministry. It is time to say something. It is time to love someone even though they may not at first appreciate it.
No comments:
Post a Comment