“The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and [it is] his glory to pass over a transgression.” (Pr 19:11 AV)
I’m particularly interested in two words; ‘…discretion…’ and ‘…deferreth…’. Both words we know. The definition is no different from the English. Discretion is prudence. It is practical wisdom. It is knowing the appropriateness of a thing. To defer is to put off or not do at all. It means to place at a later time. A few points here before we delve into these two words. Because of the use of these two words, we can assume to one who is angry did suffer something worth being angry about. Second, because anger is deferred, maybe anger has a proper place here and may indeed be warranted at some point in time. Third, since anger is warranted, and it is better put off to another time, there is one more consideration. The degree of anger may not be equal to the infraction and passing over a transgression may be wiser than the exercise of anger. This is the wisdom of this verse.
Let us think about discretion. Discretion considers profitability over justice. Sometimes, what is right on one hand may not be prudent on the other. Or, putting it another way, what may seem right may indeed be so. But maybe there is something righter. It might be right to correct a child in anger. Immediately and decisively. But it might be righter to understand why they behaved the way they did and handle it another way. For instance, a child, after a long day with grandma and without a nap, acts out on the way home. It is not ok. It is wrong. But the underlying cause was fatigue brought on by adults and the excitement of the moment. Discretion and deferring here are deliberate actions by the one who is angry about slowing the ball down. He or she allows reason to trump emotion. Even though the emotion is real and justified, acting on it may not be. What is the wisest thing to do here? Sometime, immediacy is the most prudent of all choices. Sometimes, there has to be a dramatic reaction to a wrong. Like getting cut off in traffic. Anger ensures and causes us to make a correction lest we suffer an accident. Burning oneself on the stove causes us to hasten to the cold water faucet and run water to cool the burn. There are times when exercising anger protects from more damage. There are other times when exercising anger causes more damage.
Emotion is a powerful thing. Emotions are given by God for a purpose. Generally, they are given to illicit correct and timely response to a situation where reason does not have time. Emotions can be corrupted. Ambition can turn to envy. Anger can turn to bitterness. Love can turn to lust. There are right and wrong emotions. Just like there are godly thoughts and perverse ones. The wise person may have been offended and correctly feels the emotion of anger. But unless he is in immediate danger, he is better off thinking about it. What concludes the proverb gives us the wisdom of this principle. If anger is immediately acted upon, then there is no opportunity to pass over a matter. The matter has been handled. However, if anger is deferred, then the victim can reason what response would be appropriate, if at all. Maybe the infraction would be better forgiven than righted. Maybe justice would be served, but the greater good would not. Regardless, the wise individual will not act out of anger as a patter of life. He or she will cool the situation down, get control of his or her heart, and think it all the way through. The heart can be a very dangerous thing. We do much damage because the heart is not disciplined. The wise saint will take one on the chin and think about it. He will react in a measured and appropriate manner. He will not go off the handle at every wrong. Rather, most of the time he will use the injustice productively. He just might pass over the transgression because it is in the best interest of the offender.
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