Time and Maturity Heals Wounds

“And Isaac gave up the ghost, and died, and was gathered unto his people, being old and full of days: and his sons Esau and Jacob buried him.” (Ge 35:29 AV)

 This would not have been possible twenty or so years ago.  A little over two decades ago, Esau was ready to kill his brother, Jacob.  The contention was so sharp their mother sent Jacob to her brother Laban in Haran of Mesopotamia.  Twenty years later, with two wives, thirteen children, two handmaids, and a flock fit for an army later, Jacob meets Esau on his way back home.  Jacob believes Esau will make good on his decades-old threat and splits up his family so as not to lose all in one confrontation.  But, lo and behold, the encounter turns out better than anyone could imagine.  Esau has been successful in his endeavors and has profited even more than his younger brother.  He has the freedom to go as he pleases without any obligation to be someone he is not.  His younger brother will be the nation that must conform to God’s chosen.  He does not.  Esau sees the curses of twenty years ago as his own liberation.  Given time and maturity, coupled with God’s blessings on them individually, they are able to reconcile and come together to bury their father.  Something neither of them could have imagined a lifetime ago.

What is true of Jacob and Esau can be true of the saints.  Given time and maturity, there is no reason for unforgiveness and disunity.  Life is too short to carry a grudge.  Yet many people do.  There have been many depictions of the strife between the Hatfields and McCoys.  It is said the feud grew over an argument concerning a pig.  Although embers from the civil war existed between the two families, it wasn’t until both families found themselves in a court of law of the ownership of a hog.  The witness which led to a decision in favor of the Hatfields was murdered by two McCoy men.  The death of one each of the two families led to twenty-eight years of feuding resulting in dozens of deaths, two state’s militias, and the federal government getting involved.  What could have been solved by simple humility and compensation turned into a battle that cost lives and homes.  The funny thing is, today a tourist can go to that area of the country and visit sites made famous by this feud.  There is even a dinner theatre for those so inclined.  The healing was so thorough, the two families appeared in a week-long competition of Family Feud.  Time, blessing, and purpose all worked to heal differences that, at one time, threatened their very existence.

The point is this.  If there is an ongoing feud between two people, two families, or two organizations, it is only ongoing because one or both sides want it to.  It does not need to continue.  What healed Jacob and Esau was their ability to see God’s blessing and purpose in their individual lives.  They ceased to compete with one another and were both comfortable in where God had them in life.  Their differences were truly petty and immature.  Time has a way of growing grace.  Blessing has a way of maturing humility and patience.  Jacob and Esau could come together because they could see God’s hand in it all and no matter where they were in life, or how they got there, God was always in control and always will be.  Surrender to the plan of God pours water on the fires of strife.  What a beautiful picture of forgiveness, faith, and charity we see in these two brothers.  Something we could all learn.