“My meditation of him shall be sweet: I will be glad in the LORD.” (Ps 104:34 AV)
God will be one of two things to us. Either He will be a executing judge or a loving Father. Either He will find us guilty and condemn us to a devil’s hell to be tormented day and night forever and ever. Or, He will be a Father who loves and pities us. Either He will sit upon His throne and execute final judgment. Or, He will be involved with us, bringing us unto Christlikeness. But He cannot be both at the same time. Our view of God may be tainted, but that doesn’t change who He is to us. We may think that God disapproves of us to the point that He is willing to disown us. But He cannot. We may think He has forgotten us like those who perish, but He has not. We may feel as though God is far from us, but if we are His children, we are only a prayer away. The writer is thinking upon who and what God is to him. He makes a choice. He chooses to think fondly and gratefully upon the person and nature of God. It is a choice he makes. He chooses to think on the truth rather than on his perception.
Life is not easy. No one had a perfect father. Some had better than others. But no one had a perfect one. Some had no father present. Some had a father who was always there. Some had a father who was never loving and affirming. Others had fathers who were their greatest fans. Some had fathers who abused them. Others had fathers who would go to the ends of the world to protect and provide for them. Some had fathers who didn’t care how their children ended up. Some had fathers who invested the time and wisdom to mentor their children into responsible and healthy adults. Some had fathers who never wanted anything to do with God. Others had fathers who loved the LORD with their whole hearts. No two families are alike. No two fathers are alike. Earthly fathers vary. They are of different quality and quantity. They change over time. Some for the better. Some for the worse. Our earthly fathers may disappoint us. They may even leave a few scars behind. It is no wonder that some carry baggage throughout their lives from the ruin left in the wake of a hateful or absent father. To remember them with sweetness of memory is impossible. But our God is not that person!
Our God is always the same. Depending on who and what we are will determine our relationship with Him and our perception of Him. But He can never change. We may not understand why He does certain things or why He has allowed other things. But that does not change who and what He is. Maybe we don’t understand why our prayers were answered contrary to our wishes or why our hopes and dreams didn’t turn out. But that doesn’t change who and what God is. Maybe we wonder how close or distant He seems. But that doesn’t change who and what God is. Maybe our lives are not where we thought they would be, or that somehow, the LORD did not figure it the same way we did. But that doesn’t change who and what God is. God may not always be what we want Him to be. God may allow things that hurt rather than heal. But that doesn’t change who and what God is. How we choose to think upon Him is a matter of faith. Either we remember God for what He says He is and see manifestations of what He says He is, or we choose to trust our own perception and reasoning. Either way, that doesn’t change who and what God is. The Psalmist chooses to sweetly think of God. He chooses to be grateful rather than anything else. He makes a promise to his own heart that as he lay down to sleep, he will recollect all the good that has come from God and all the bad from which He delivered him. How we choose to think on God goes a long way in how we experience life.
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