Love Beyond Death

“And we said unto my lord, The lad cannot leave his father: for [if] he should leave his father, [his father] would die.” (Ge 44:22 AV)

These words are spoken by Judah to Joseph as they barter for Benjamin.  I don’t think this is an exaggeration.  Joseph and Benjamin are full brothers.  As far as Jacob knows, Joseph is dead.  The only son he has by Rachel is Benjamin.  Having lost one son, Judah’s argument is that Jacob would not survive the news that Benjamin had been taken as well.  As I read this, I could help but be moved by the depth of love Jacob had for Benjamin.  For a father to lose his son and it affect him so deeply as to wish to die is not shallow love by any means.  This love is a depth of love experienced by few.

This brings me back to the deepest sorrow I would ever feel.  I have lost both parents, a brother, and many friends.  But the deepest sense of loss I ever felt was when my son left for the foreign mission field.  It had come when my mother and my organ player (who was a dear friend and confidant) both passed away.  So, the sense of loss was rather raw and deep.  Three months after my mother passed and two months after my organist and good friend died, my son left the country for a new life.  I had never wept as deep and hard as I did that night.  It never occurred to me that we could video call and that he and my grandkids would be back in about four years.  I wept as if I had buried the entire family.  It was so deep and raw that muscle aches continued for days.  I saw how much it affected my father when my brother was killed.  I had never seen him weep so deeply before or since then.  I cannot imagine what it would be like to lose a child.  Life is not supposed to work that way.  When I think of Jacob and Benjamin, this is what I think of.  Jacob would have missed Benjamin so much that it would literally kill him.

Then the Spirit reminded me of the love of the Father toward us.  Jacob could only love Joseph and Benjamin inasmuch as his life was within him.  He had limits.  If he tried more than he could possibly give, it would kill him.  Yet the Father is eternal and infinite.  If Jacob could love his son unto death, God can and does love us infinitely more.  Because we are finite beings with a beginning and a measured existence, we cannot possibly fathom eternity or infinity.  Therefore, the love by which God loves us is far deeper than any human love could ever be.  As much as it would pain Jacob to lose his son, so much the more for an infinite being.  God cannot die.  But He can feel.  To lose even one human soul would be indescribably painful.  To lose the fellowship of a backsliding child would be excruciating.  God loves us infinitely.  Which means He also feels loss equally deeply.  That is how much God loves you.  He loves you with an infinite love, which cannot be measured or understood.  Oh, what love!